The Struggle is Real.

My mama said, “This too shall pass.” I have those words permanently etched in my skin. I believe the words, but some days it can be hard to remember.

I have days when I feel empty and lost. I put on a smile and let my expressions hide the turmoil going on inside. Some days are harder than others and although I have many people in my corner, I feel alone.

There are days when I allow the feeling of discouragement to take root in my heart despite what I know the Word says. I have days when I pour out my heart to the Lord and feel no comfort, hear no answer, see no end to the struggle.

“Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior.”

Habakkuk 3:17-18

These profound verses tell me my attitude and what I choose to say and do in response to these difficult times can affect change. I might not see change in my circumstance, but I can see change in my heart. These moments are meant to test my resolve and teach me to praise my God when it isn’t convenient. Worship isn’t only for the good times, but as I’m obedient to God, it makes a way for Him to break me loose from the chains of my emotions and get my eyes back on Him in the hard times.

Even when I feel alone, when I’m in the valley, I’m under attack and completely at a loss for what to do, I will rejoice in the Lord. He died for me. He took my shame, my sickness, and my sin upon Himself and was nailed to the cross. He descended into hell and took all of it with Him. All that He took for me is still there, but He is not. He is risen and I am forgiven. There is nothing more worthy of praise than that. It’s hard not to wallow in self-pity sometimes, but God is so good there is nothing else worth my time, thoughts, or energy.

Prayer: Father, I’m a bit of a mess sometimes. I love to sit and think about how terrible things are at times. Forgive me for putting my circumstances above Your work on the cross. I know I do it and I’m sorry. Help me to see my pride ahead of time, before the point of idolizing my victim-hood. Teach me how to prevent it and kill that prideful spirit in me. Teach me to look to You for every answer, every time and to wait on You for as long as it takes. Thank You for the joy I have in knowing You. That joy is my strength. I love You, Lord. Amen

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